This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

How To Make Money From Facebook In 3 Simple Steps

Submitted by Tyler Durden on 11/08/2013 16:12 -0400

It's quite simple.

h/t Lance

- advertisements -

by Taboola

Old & Famous JalebiwalaHappy Trips

PHOTOS जो बताती हैं कितनी स्टाइलिश और ग्लैमरस थीं सुनंदा पुष्करDainik Bhaskar

Cyrus DhabharZigwheels

12 Simple Ways to Be More AttractiveTenetNews.com

India's Best Honeymoon DestinationsHappy Trips

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:15 | 4136508slotmouth

The problem is that for most people step 4 looks like this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPw-3e_pzqU

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:17 | 4136518Oracle of Kypseli

Step 4 short the stock and wait

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:36 | 4136569Groundhog Day

Shorting is too risky. The NSA loves the company for all the free info so it will likely never go away

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:45 | 4136600johnQpublic

whats groupon trading at after its blistering ipo of twenty bucks?

10 bucks

i expect better from twitter

whats facebook at? 47? insanity

i expect better

(my definition of better isnt what someone who owns the stock would want)

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:12 | 4136707kaiserhoff

Do not short anything in a rigged market.

Do not trust stop loss orders. Llyod and Jamie will run your stops.

Stocks like Faceplant and Twatter are the reason god invented puts.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:02 | 4136663resurger

+ hes a Joo, Hello Kitto

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:10 | 4136698amadeusb4

You are confusing stock going to zero w company ceasing operations. In fact, a low low stock price would be great as then anyone, like say a GCHQ front or the equivalent in the US, could take the company "private".

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 19:52 | 4137170MichiganMilitiaMan

Shorts have been crushed past several years, and will continue to be crushed until morale is 100% bullish.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:15 | 4136512Bay of Pigs

FarceBerg dead ahead!

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:17 | 4136520Tenshin Headache

Twitter looks to be going out at another all time low :)

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:37 | 4136575Groundhog Day

I wonder when the early investor who are cashing out start tweeting on what a shity company it is so they can take private again in the low single digits and do this ipo all over again in a few years

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:19 | 4136524island

Or just find an employer that doesn't watch its employees - like Group Health Cooperative where even employment law attorneys are on FB all day and nobody cares. Just another reason health care costs are so high.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:20 | 4136527Skateboarder

I made my account in '06 when it was for college students only. It was fucking cool and useful! Then started the changes, with personal messages with 'love and care and promise for a better tomorrow' from the main mon Zucks hisself. By '08 the site was in full force, not very tolerable at that point. No 'likes' yet. I didn't use it for a couple of years, used it again in '10 for a year before retiring it.

*puke*

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:31 | 4136787MayIMommaDogFac...

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

I quit too and I could rant about some philosophical paranoid underpinnings to the reason-for-it, but the fact still remains:

the flat-out-raw-value of FB to me versus the amount of time it wanted to suck away from me (even at $0.00/month) was always a negative

As software goes, the hype about FB is about as far and wide as one can imagine. The utility value -- uh not so much.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:20 | 4136528q99x2

I don't have an account.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:22 | 4136536orangegeek

...and then short the stock (sell calls, buy puts).

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:24 | 4136542new game

no can do.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:31 | 4136553Mesquite

Good one... :-)

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:32 | 4136557Kreditanstalt

What "work"? There are no jobs.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:32 | 4136559Disenchanted

1. steal idea

2. get fellow tribe members in all fields of endeavor to help pimp your ill-gotten shit/protect you

3. roll in clownbux, then launder them into real assets

Cheesepopes FTMFW

(h/t f_s)

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:00 | 4136657ThirdWorldDude

Free francis_sawyer!!!

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:05 | 4136677dick cheneys ghost

god, how I miss francis_sawyer

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:18 | 4136734Pseudo Anonym

he was banned. he knew too much (just like many others); and that was not ok w/ the tribe that invested in zh. be careful there cheney or the veneral diseases (VD), abe foxman's agent, will be all over you like syphylis for liking f_s; and you will be banned too.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:24 | 4136761dick cheneys ghost

@pseudo..............where have you been.........have not seen you posting much

I agree, f_s, knew too much

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:39 | 4136829Pseudo Anonym

i moved on. zh is not what it used to be since they sold out to abc media. pfft. fight club my ass. fight club - the new oxymoron. posters getting censored, posts delted, users deleted, banned, etc. if i wanted to be politically correct, i'd hang out at yahoo. or zh.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:13 | 4136937EcoJoker

Yet you are still HERE POSTING AT THIS VERY MOMENT.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:19 | 4136951Pseudo Anonym

s/he asked where i was (past tense)

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:58 | 4137060dick cheneys ghost

@pseudo...........good to see you back, hope you will stick around.........

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 20:00 | 4137216Rusty Shorts

yeah, I used to wake up every morning to Project Mayhem, Tyler and Marla.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 20:11 | 4137232Pseudo Anonym

oh yeah, marla. marla used to put some good tunes together for the weekend, remember?

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 11:00 | 4138274Rusty Shorts

ah yes, the real Fight Club back then.

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 12:29 | 4138418atomp

any recommendations for where to move on?

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:55 | 4136879A. Magnus

He knew too much? Are you fucking kidding me? Since when is rehashing old Hitler speech topics an indication of 'knowing too much?' Francis Sawyer was a FED just like his old butt buddy Hal Turner - who was paid by the FBI to rattle the Klansman redneck cage.

The Feds pay for trolls to post a bunch of idiotic shit on forums like these in order to fabricate an excuse to have the site taken down for the violation of 'hate crime' laws. The Tylers probably saw through Sawyer's 'joo' baiting to avoid getting the Aaron Swartz treatment. You know, the guy who started Reddit but was killed in prison with the feds saying he 'hung himself.'

Hitler was FINANCED by the very same 'joos' that Sawyer bitched about. Sawyer NEVER questioned how it was that a bunch of 'joos' were able to supposedly BEAT their worldly superiors - especially since 'joos' aren't particularly smarter or better fighters than anybody else...

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:15 | 4136918Pseudo Anonym

pfft, i dont want to call you an idiot but this is a really stupid reason and justification for the nonsense you just posted:

...in order to fabricate an excuse to have the site taken down for the violation of 'hate crime' laws. The Tylers probably saw through Sawyer's 'joo' baiting...

jus6 so you know, zh servers are not in the fed's jurisdiction. at least do some rudimentary backround work before you post some dumb shit.

ZeroHedge.com

Registrant:
ABC Media Ltd
P.O. Box 3
Sofia, Sofia 1784
BG

Domain name: ZEROHEDGE.COM

Administrative Contact:
    Hristozov, Georgi
    P.O. Box 3
    Sofia, Sofia 1784
    BG
    +359 2 875 35 99
Technical Contact:
    Hristozov, Georgi
    P.O. Box 3
    Sofia, Sofia 1784
    BG
    +359 2 875 35 99

Registrar of Record: easyDNS Technologies, Inc.
Record last updated on 02-May-2012.
Record expires on 11-Jan-2017.
Record created on 11-Jan-2009.

Registrar Domain Name Help Center:
http://helpwiki.easydns.com

Domain servers in listed order:
    DNS1.EASYDNS.COM
    DNS4.EASYDNS.INFO
    DNS2.EASYDNS.NET
    DNS3.EASYDNS.ORG

edit: ps. somebody much smarter than i am said (voltaire?) something along the lines that " if you want to know who rules over you, find out who you are not allowed to criticize". now go figure out for what a long list of posters was banned from zh and that should give you some indication who invested in zh and who runs this site.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 19:12 | 4137097Tijuana Donkey Show

All .Com, .Net, and .Orgs are controlled by the root level ICANN setup which is controlled by the.... USA. http://www.icann.org/en/about/welcome

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 02:00 | 4137931Tompooz

Not only the .com, .net and .org's. ALL TLD's and their sub-domains are under ICANN control. Also the country code TLD's. Remember when .iq was taken down?

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 21:40 | 4137465resurger

Yup! I think ZH is going down

Mon, 11/11/2013 - 08:35 | 4142312e-recep

I think ZH gets support from the Rothschild clan. Barclays, HSBC and Standard Chartered never get hammered here at ZH. It's always the JPM or GS.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 21:38 | 4137462resurger

Why the fuck Francis Sawyer was banned?

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:18 | 4136733SilverCoinLover

No, keep him banned. His Jew bashing became too extreme. Even if every Jew were to vanish from the face of the earth, you would still have the corrupt Federal Reserve and corrupt US Government in power, it would just be run by.....non Jews.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:59 | 4137062NuYawkFrankie

Don't forget Tom as well.... he's a bin a paintin' tha' fence faaaa...r too long!

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:32 | 4136560trader1

not only that, but you regain sanity.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:42 | 4136594RubberJohnny

Throw a deactivation party and invite folks so you can talk to them face to face.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:47 | 4136611edifice

FB, in its early days, was a great marketing tool. My band made quite a bit from marketing there. Once it degenerated to people posting what they ate that day--and Liking everything, instead of interacting with other users--we all cancelled our accounts and haven't looked back.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:49 | 4136614MopWater

Lol @deactivate account...

You think they delete your info? You think they let you walk away clean? They keep your seat warm, get the needle prepped for you when you come back for seamless reintegration...

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 16:54 | 4136632praps

Do want to make $$$$$ on your computer? Simply press shift 4 five times!

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:05 | 4136672Kirk2NCC1701

True! But, by the same token... "How to make money from ZH..."

If you are the Idle Rich or the Idle FSA, ignore all advice. You will anyway. /s

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:22 | 4136758AgShaman

Just "friend" me....and I'll explain the process

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:30 | 4136771CaptainSpaulding

It's quite simple. Just hit the buy button on your etrade account on the lows. When the stock goes higher, Hit thesell button on the highs. Its so simple, Even a caveman can do it

http://ken_ashford.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/10/24/geicocave...

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 17:35 | 4136808debtor of last ...

Facebook is the future. It's all about soul transplant. Place your bets.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:11 | 4136928EcoJoker

I deactivated my account months ago and these fuckers refuse to remove it. They keep acting like it's legit. The numbers they are reporting on active users is just plain bullshit.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 18:20 | 4136952mirac

Do a search on "How to remove FB account. I use Ixquick. Go there and you will see why tht is my search of choice. Think it can be done, but since I do not have a FB account, and have never tried to delete it, but have read some articles that indicate that you can-not 100% sure.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 19:20 | 4137121tarsubil

Worked for me!

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 23:14 | 4137673Golden Showers

K, can some one give me some help here? I put the business end of my 12 guage into my mouth, but I'm having a hard time reaching the safety and trigger.

My arms aren't long enough. I'm going to deep throat this thing, try throw up all over the barrel and hopefully asphyxiate on my own vomit. I put a ball of twine around the trigger for my cat to pull on.

I wish Courtney Love was here. She'd know what to do.

I saw Kurt and Michael in my dreams friending me on fakebooc from Heaven. I'm off to ride unicorns and pegasi with the Patrick Swaze. I voted for Bambam because I wanted an iphone 7 with a liger fraggle stick car.

Never look back. Fare forward.

Fri, 11/08/2013 - 23:53 | 4137761buyingsterling

Don't do it

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 00:56 | 4137864ToNYC

FB: Self-disintermediation; the sliced of life.

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 05:34 | 4138024USisCorrupt

But what about my MySpace Account? I am still trying to get Ashley Dupree to add me.

What is FaceBook again?

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 09:09 | 4138155Took Red Pill

FB is a tool of gov't with it's facial recognition. NSA learns who's who and who they are friends with. It's so easy. People just tell them!

Sat, 11/09/2013 - 10:53 | 4138262willwork4food

FB is a tool one can use to find friends that you haven't heard from in years, have "friends" you'ld rather not find, find you, then lose them all when they delete you 'cause you didn't like their lil pet hampster.

bite coins 11

Tuesday, 13 January 2015

How To Make Money From Facebook In 3 Simple Steps

No comments:

About Me